What Matters

I want to share an e-mail forwarded to me by a very close friend, Dr. Mark. I grew up with him and we have known each other since we were kids. He continues to be an encouragement to me, as I journey through my walk with the Lord. Here's the e-mail content:
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What matters
By Cito Beltran
Broadcast-Journalist
The Philippine Star

Having opted to live a less stressful lifestyle away from the limelight or the Rat Race, it's but normal for people who made the choice, to sometimes wonder if they did the right thing. They experience pangs of guilt about being underemployed, less productive and certainly reduced in their income potential. While everyone else is BUSY making a LIVING, you ask yourself if it's a mature thing to be at home or semi-retired at the farm. Are you wasting all your God-given talents raising kids, growing your own food, or simply living on very little money and simple needs? Shouldn't you be involved in today's politics, today's technology?And are your friends right about saying "Sayang Ka"?

Last month, a friend called me about an opening in a major corporation that was paying P300,000 a month, all the perks, and even a brand new Volvo. My friend asked me how I would react if the job was offered to me since I was very qualified. It took me all of 5 seconds to tell her I wouldn't accept it.

To begin with P100,000 would certainly end up with the government as taxes. That would leave me with only P200,000. To earn that, I would have to be at work by eight everyday, instead of coming up with imaginative tricks to wake up my daughter like placing her puppy in her bed, or simply standing over her watching this angelic child in her field of dreams.
I would have to eat breakfast by six, leave the house by 6:30. That means no more breakfast conversations with my wife and certainly an end to our morning prayers not just for us but for family and friends. From the P200,000, I would have to spend at least P20,000 a month or 10% of net to pay for gasoline driving the brand new Volvo to office everyday. So in effect, I would only be earning P180,000 or even less. Not to mention that my friends who sell Mercedes Benzes, Jaguars, etc. would brand me as a traitor.

From the net salary of +/- P180,000, I would have to give up the lunch I have with my wife 3 to 4 times a week at home. Instead my power of choice adds another burden where I would have to decide daily where in the business district I ought to have lunch, merienda if needed,
and from time to time even dinner. I would have to choose from a menu instead of whipping up something in my kitchen.

When you add up the bill, plus service charge, plus VAT you can easily average another P20,000 in expenses. Which means, that what we originally thought would be a net income of P200,000 has now gone down to P160,000.

In the absence of maintenance you can enter about P10,000 as your average monthly repair bill for labor and materials. So now, you discover you're only earning P150,000 a month.
Instead of being in a HOME I own, I will have to try to be "at home' in an office where I will be spending more of my "awake time". This finally solves the puzzle; why do we always fill our offices with personal stuff which we will have to take home in a box when we retire, resign or get fired? From having my independence and personal views, I would then have a real live flesh and bones Boss (because of what I thought was P200,000 a month salary) can tell me how to jump! Someone who's seniority or proprietary rights automatically makes him right even if he's stupid.

Because you now have to spend most of the time at the office or behind a desk, you can't do your regular walk in the park or jog around the village which is also your bonding time with your spouse, your kids, or your dogs.

You either join a gym or get a personal trainer. When you total fees, travel, and outfits, your monthly fitness bill would be around P5,000 which means your net pay just went down to P145,000 a month or less than half the original offered salary. My dear wife reminds me to include clothing and image-related expenditures specially for women. The clothes, the make-up, the jewelry, as well as the business accessories such as the laptop loaded with
Vistas program, the latest cell phones, iPod etc.

Even if you paid all of that on installment for 24 months, it would be in the area of P20,000 a month which further reduces your income to P125,000 a month.

The problem with this major part of the expense is many people mistakenly call them necessary investments, professional expense, but don't see them as deductions from PERSONAL wealth. It would also mean, not sharing the responsibility of taking our child to school, missing out on small talk that tell you big things in children's minds, and dropping out on all the parent-child activities. I would also nullify all the adjustments we made in
the last 5 years where we integrated home life with work in order to be more of a family than employees with a family.

Speaking of home life, anyone who spends a lot of time at work can testify that in your absence you will have to hire a full crew to do all the maintenance and repair you use to prevent or do yourself when you spend time at home. In your absence, who's going to fix leaking roofs, flooded toilets, busted aircons, creaking doors, or all the usual things REAL MEN with real tools do? If I actually went out to get the job that pays P300,000 plus a brand new Volvo, it would have cost mebreakfasts with my wife, trips to school with my
daughter, morning talks and prayers with God, affirmation of my role as husband, father. I would be relinquishing responsibility for my house, as well as my home.

What we've done is determine what really matters, what and how much we really need, give up what we don't need or care for and trust in God and not in men. This is what I call real life cost-benefit analysis. To make an accounting of what we think we're getting against what we know we're losing.

Sometimes earning more actually costs more.

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And here's my reply:
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Thanks, bro. I needed that. I do wonder sometimes if I made the right choice living in a slow-paced city, spending time with my parents, my stroke-victimized grandma, and my dogs. I work next door to the church, which means I can attend prayer meetings and midweek Bible studies. I serve as a worship leader, musician, and second man to my pastor. I get to spend an hour with God every morning in prayer and Bible reading if I wanted, and still read my Bible at night, answer e-mails, check out my crush's personal web site, and still be able to take a shower before bed time. I can live a simple life earning a middle-class income, but still support my family and my church financially.

I love you bro, and I know I made the right choice. God bless you and have a prosperous journey.

RJ

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The simple things in life come with simple choices. And though we take ventures in faith, we don't always know if we did the right thing, until we look back and see the fruit that it has produced. God is faithful.

Rey Lord and Macel's Wedding

April 14, 2007 - I attended a wedding. Two of my former classmates, Rey Lord and Macel, performed their wedding vows in church -- twice. The first was a Catholic ceremony and the second one was a Protestant ceremony. They decided it was the best thing to do, coming from different family backgrounds.

Rey Lord has been my friend since high school. Macel became our classmate in college. They became sweethearts in college at UPV Miag-ao, where we spent our college years studying to become geeks... Er,... IT professionals.

This was also kind of a college reunion for us.

Men in White


Ladies and Gentlemen


The Reception

So the wedding was mainly a four-part event: The Catholic ceremony, the cocktail and snacks, the Protestant ceremony, and the reception. I didn't stay for the dance.

During the reception, all the single guys had to pop balloons instead of catching the garter. The one who had the least balloons popped would be the guy to place the garter on one of the single ladies. So we had a tie -- Antonio and myself. We didn't pop any balloons (It was difficult to pop!) So to break the tie, we had to have a dance contest. This was my most embarrassing moment at the wedding. Here's the video. I hope you can laugh with me on this. I can't embed this right now, so just click on the link below:

RJ's Dance

Days of the Ordinary

And it came to pass in process of time, that the king of Egypt died: and the children of Israel sighed by reason of the bondage, and they cried, and their cry came up unto God by reason of the bondage.

And God heard their groaning, and God remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac, and with Jacob.

And God looked upon the children of Israel, and God had respect unto them.

Now Moses kept the flock of Jethro his father in law, the priest of Midian: and he led the flock to the backside of the desert, and came to the mountain of God, even to Horeb.

And the angel of the LORD appeared unto him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush: and he looked, and, behold, the bush burned with fire, and the bush was not consumed.

Exodus 2:23-3:2

Everyday is ordinary. Routine...work...boring? Perhaps not. God uses times like these to prepare us for greater service. Consider the story of Moses. Moses the prince. Moses the military general. Now he's Moses the murderer, Moses the fugitive. He fled from Egypt and lived near the backside of the desert, tending the flock. As Moses was running, God was working behind the scenes. God was answering the prayers of His people, Israel. And God will use a man whose daily routine was watching over the flock, and was content to do it. God was getting ready to call Moses who had no idea what great things lay ahead for him.

Contentment is a very important character that God wants to develop in us. The Bible says "But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment let us be therewith content." (1 Timothy 6:6-8). When our hearts are set on things above, and not hungry for material things that we don't really need, we become a ready vessel for God to use. God uses those whose eyes are fixed on Jesus. We are in this world but not of it.

Our daily routine can be an opportunity to look around us. There's always an opportunity to encourage, to love, to share. There's always an opportunity to tell the truth about Jesus to others. The ordinary days are important to God. It is the place to grow, and when those seasons come for God to move mightily and show forth His glory to the world, then we will be ready and well-prepared to be used by God. We have to be faithful in the little things. How we respond to the ordinary days will determine how we respond to the extreme days of the Spirit. That's because what's really in our hearts is exposed in the ordinary days -- days we would consider "boring" or "routine." In reality, this is where the action begins.

So be anxious for nothing. This is the season for planting, the season for preparing. It is at least that way in my life right now.

My Bread Crumbs

And Jesus said to them, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger, and he who believes in Me shall never thirst. ^{..." - John 6:35}

"This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success." - Joshua 1:8

"...Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God."
- Matthew 4:4


December 2005. In the year that endeth, my project accomplished to be it is (Yoda voice). Hectic schedule can affect neurological signals. Excited to come home to Iloilo for Christmas, I left my bread crumbs in Manila.

The Word of God is compared to bread. It is our daily sustainance. Jesus even said it about Himself. And I remember the story of Hansel and Gretel as they were marking their path with bread crumbs, making sure that they could get home safely. When I thought about the Word being bread and those bread crumbs, I started something called "The Bread Trail".

Before going to Manila for my hectic schedule back in November 2005, I would write down Scriptures that would grab me while reading my Bible as well as those I remember from years past. I would also write down good stuff I read in Christian books, especially those you can carry for life. I would place these in small index cards and bind them with a metal ring. That way I can keep them in my pocket and flip and read them throughout the day from time to time. This was my method of meditating on the Word day and night. But in Manila I left one set of my index cards. For a long time I only had the second half with me, The Bread Trail #2. I had some good notes on #1, and I missed it. It wasn't easy to move on. The only thing that kept me going was knowing at least I still had the Bible.

But recently my aunt from Manila came to visit us, and just when I didn't expect, after more than a year, she was carrying #1. She's still here as I'm writing this.

Praise God. I can run again, with a spring in my step, carrying the Word wherever I go.